Friendships and playdates
A playdate that has a start, a game, and an end is a skill. We practise it with one peer before we talk about a whole class of friends.
Written by the Inclusive Developmental and Therapy Center therapy team · medically reviewed by Dr Muhammad Suffyan, MB BS (GMC 8023727) · Last reviewed September 2026
What to set up
One child, a short time, a game that has turns, a parent nearby then further away. Repair: sorry, try again, leave. Teens: friendships hub.
When anxiety is the wall
Psychology sits with Salman. Related: anxiety, shy or anxious.
How to end while it is still going well
The useful playdate is shorter than you think. End on a high, with a goodbye that exists. Tears at the door every time usually means the slot was too long, not that friendship is impossible.
Repair — sorry, try again, leave — is a taught skill. Cluster: a session.
Cousins, parks and birthday parties
A cousin is often the first peer. A park is a harder room. A birthday party is not step one. If they only play with adults, keep the adult as the safe base and add one child, then fade.
Shorter than you think
Tears at the door every time usually means the slot was too long. Teens: friendships for autistic teens.
The idea behind the work (in the books)
A playdate with a start, a game and an end is a skill. Popularity is not a therapy goal.
Tomasello — shared intentionality
Two people want the same thing and both know it. A ball rolled back and forth is that moment. A birthday party is not.
Kasari — peer engagement
One peer before a group. End while it is still going well.
What the research tells us
This isn’t just our opinion — it’s grounded in published research. Here are a few findings from trusted, independent sources:
NICE CG170 recommends a play-based social-communication intervention with parents, carers and teachers to increase joint attention, engagement and reciprocal communication, adjusted to the child’s developmental level. For pre-school children it recommends parent mediation.
— NICE Clinical Guideline CG170 — Autism spectrum disorder in under 19s: support and management. View source
Take a worksheet home
Print one sheet. Fill it in this week. Bring it to the consultation — a consultation is Rs 1,500 and lasts up to 50 minutes.
Requesting cards
Help, more, finished, stop, my turn, can I play — a faster ask than screaming.
First–then board
The hard moment, then the promised good thing — set out before the fight starts.
Social-skills program (PDF)
A playdate with a start and an end.
Book a consultation
Contact owner Muhammad Salman Afzal first. No referral needed. A consultation is Rs 1,500 and lasts up to 50 minutes.
Friendships — questions parents ask
They only want to play with adults.
That is a stage. We add one peer while the adult is still the safe base, then fade.
The playdate always ends in tears.
Shorten it. End while it is still going well. Ending is a skill too.
They have one friend and that is enough. Is that a problem?
Often that is enough this year. One friend who lasts is better than a class of names they cannot use.
They have one friend. Is that enough?
Often yes, this year. One friend who lasts is better than a class of names they cannot use.
Ask about friendships
A short, friendly conversation is the best first step. Call, text or WhatsApp us — we’ll listen and guide you, with no pressure.
MPS Road, Block A Model Town, Multan (near Bloomfield Hall School, Street No. 2) · Mon–Fri, 2 PM – 6 PM